Fuck perfect!

fuckperfect

Perfection. You little nasty thing, you. You find me again and again. No matter where I’m hiding. Telling me, I’m not educated enough, I have nothing to say, I can’t empower anyone, I’m not a fashion blogger. – (Haha!) So here it is.

I’m here to tell this to everybody who wants to know it. I am not here to be perfect. I am here to be real.

I’m sure that my English is not the most mother-tongue-like in the world and I know that I need to improve my commas. 

But I never said that this blog was about perfection nor is it about grammatical high-class. It’s about being alive, being vulnerable, being the best version of yourself and by my definition this is not (only) rated with the ability to put the comma correctly.

And I believe in bringing out the good of people, so if I only touch one soul, if only one person says or thinks „Wow – this is fucking real“ or „Oh, I’m not alone with this shitty thoughts“ – I am more than content about everything going on here.

So everyday I decide new that today I show up in my life. I show up because I want to, even more because I feel like this is what I need to do! I show up and keep staying real, keep showing you my vulnerability, my being human, my story.

I show up because I feel that I have a social responsibilty to tell everyone that he or she is worthy enough and that every new day can be a new start in a new life. I show up because I believe in women and I want to spread the word about things that matter to me like being REEEEEEAAL baby, not just some kind of version your parents always liked to show.

So hey I’m not perfect. Not at all. But I am the perfect me. I claim my power and I have decided that I will use my words for good. That I will help you feel alright. That I will help me feel alright. That I am here to make a change. And that I’m not only sitting around waiting for a miracle to happen. I choose to create, to breathe, to live. With meaning and purpose and soul. Like I fucking mean it! And I do mean it!

So if you…

think your not pretty enough

nor intelligent enough

nor skinny enough

nor brave enough

nor special enough

I am here to fucking tell you. STOP IT. JUST STOP THIS SHIT PLEASE. YOU ARE ENOUGH. You’re even more than enough. You are you – and believe me no one can be a better you than you!! We all need you to be you!

I’ve been standing around the most brave and strong and beautiful women hearing from a very intelligent woman thatone of her biggest fears is to be not intelligent enough. And believe me she is really intelligent- she’s a lawyer. But she’s much more than that. But whenever I feel that I am not creative enough or not brave enough – I see her in front of me. She’s so intelligent that it hurts me that she doesn’t really see it. But THERE ARE DAYS WHEN WE ALL ARE HER! We can’t say how  great we are.

As I said above, I am afraid of not being creative enough. It’s ridiculous I know 🙂

I am afraid that I am not brave enough. That’s ridiculous too.

I am afraid that I am not worthy of love.

I am afraid that I am not accepted from society, at the same time I don’t even want to be part of this system. I rather create my own.

I am afraid that I am a bad mother. I CARE SO MUCH ABOUT being a good mom. I love my little sunshine more than eeeeeverything 🙂 ! My heart jumps when I wake up everyday besides her, sometimes she kisses me and that’s how I got to wake up, I mean wow that’s a blessing. I’ve struggled with finding time for myself and was afraid that if I care for myself too, that I am a bad mom. I am really into finding a great balance that works for everybody in our family. Not just for the kid, not just for the hubby, and not just for me. For everyone.

So today I am here to tell you I am not perfect but I am real. And I want you to be real too.

so much love, D.

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2 comments

  1. Oh my dear Deborah! You are such a light, you know that? <3 <3 <3 Just the fact that I cannot let one day pass without checking your blog and reading your wonderful words proves this. 🙂

    So, thank your for the time you take writing these posts. Thank you for the magical and touching workshop you created and hosted. You are creative. You are brave. You are smart. You are beautiful.
    And I am absolutely and 100% sure that you are an AWESOME mother!

    I know this feeling very well, the fear that taking time for yourself will make you a bad mother (next to a bad partner aswell). As a mother who works and also needs a lot of time for herself to grow and learn, I often feel like I am not the perfect mother, or not motherly enough. Especially in this society that has a very particular opinion on how a mother has to act and be. So I have to remind myself from time to time again, that I am fine the way I am, that I am doing my best and that the immense love I have for this amazing little girl (who I am lucky to call my daughter) is more than enough. It's more than okay to go your own path when it comes to motherhood and to trust your own heart. And by following our hearts and taking care of ourselves aswell, we are hopefully setting a good example for our daughters.

    Lots of love,
    Sophie

    P.S. I've been wanting to send you an email, hoping that we might find some time to meet up (maybe even with the girls), but somehow I never manage to actually sit down and write it (hehe). Well, I promise you will get it soon! It would be so nice to see you again! 🙂

    (BTW, I am so bad with commas too, especially when it comes to English, which is kind of embarassing, considering all the education I've been through, haha. Ah well, who cares. I don't. ;))

    1. Oh Sophie! 🙂 thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu! Wow – this comment makes me really jumping! sooooo wonderful of you. It’s so true what you say. I’m amazed by your words. Can’t say more 😀 haha! Yes I want to meet you too and I had the same thoughts about writing the email. 🙂 thank you so much <3 ! hear, read, see you soon! so much love...

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